Have you ever been meandering down a pointless path of thought and then suddenly stopped and wondered how the hell you got there in the first place? And why you were even thinking about it? Welcome to my life on a daily basis
i stopped by walgreens the other day, because it was one of those weeks and I only go into walgreens when it’s one of those weeks. If you haven’t caught on to what one of those weeks is my walgreens receipt usually consists of chocolate, a random makeup item (to give me hope for the future) and one other item that my mother will probably be mortified that I mentioned on public Internet but ok it’s tampons. (breathe mom, i’ll type it quite a few times in the next couple of paragraphs so just hold on)
i was in a mood and i was angry at the world (a common feeling during one of those weeks) for having to even buy these ridiculous wads of cotton at highly inflated prices anyways, so it wasn’t a perusing kind of day, it was a get in get out and get that chocolate in my mouth asap kind of a day. So of course I didn’t notice until after I had handed over ten washingtons for a box of cotton(as in $10 guys. keep up) that the box had been tampered with. the top had clearly been bent back and a handful of tampons were missing.
now as soon as i realized what had happened (to clue you in: i bought a box of tamponians that someone had stolen a few from. i.e they had stolen tampons.), i went into a kind of stupor. I just kept staring at that stupid bent up box thinking, “what in the world would posses you to steal tampons? how low a person would you have to be to get a kick out of stealing bits of wadded up cotton on a string? where was your life?!”
but then i started thinking, “you know what, i had just been complaining about having to buy tampons. if i had no Jimminy Cricket and didn’t care about my soul then I would probably steal tampons as well. I mean it costs probably less than 5 cents (why is there not a cent button on the keyboard?) to make these things, and here they are stealing ten freakin bucks from me, ugh society is so messed up”but THEN i switched gears, “oh my bless what if it was some poor starving woman who didn’t have $10 to spend on tampons, so she had to steal them and now she feels horribly guilty but it’s not like she can return them, oh why did she start stealing, it starts with tampons and next thing you know it’s a car.”
and then I stopped myself and began pondering my sanity and tried to back track and figure out how in the world I got from buying tampons to praying for tamponless girls stealing cars.
The happy ending of this story? I didn’t go back in and demand a new box of tampons. I decided to buy that half opened box to make up for the ones that the poor girl had stolen from the huge mega corporation that probably never noticed anything was missing.
i worry about myself sometimes, i really do